Postpartum anxiety is incredibly common among new parents.  Some anxiety is necessary to keep your baby safe and ensure that they do not become unwell or develop an illness. However, a combination of hormones, isolation, and a heightened sense of responsibility means that it is all too easy for that anxiety to become excessive. This can leave you in a heightened state of worry; constantly on the lookout for something that could go wrong with your little one. 

Rather than getting rid of all anxiety, the goal is to reduce your anxiety levels to a manageable level that is not interfering with your life.  By following these 6 practical Cognitive Behavioural Therapy tips, you can start to manage your worry, feel much more content, and able to enjoy your time with your baby.

1. Challenge your worries

It is easy to let your worries run away with you, but when you find yourself spiraling, try to use simple thought challenging questions to help you manage.  A helpful question is “what would my best friend say to me about this situation?” Or another, “How would I feel about this situation if I were not feeling anxious?”  The purpose of these questions is not to change negative thinking into positive. Instead, it is about trying to build a more balanced perspective of the situation. This will help you gain perspective rather than jumping to the worst-case scenario.

2. Retrain your attention

This is an important skill to be able to manage worry.  If you can learn to shift your focus, you will be more able to notice that you are worrying, and then move your attention elsewhere.  A method of doing this is to ground yourself in the present moment. Exercise all of your senses by noticing all of the things that you can see, hear, touch, smell, and taste.  When you feel attention drifting back to your worries, gently re-focus this away again.  By learning this skill, you will be able to move your attention from a negative spiral of worry to something that feels more helpful. Like with any skill, this takes practice.. So be patient with yourself.

3. Face your fears

What are you currently avoiding due to feeling anxious?  It is understandable why you would avoid the things that cause you anxiety. However, the more that you avoid doing these things, the more extreme the anxiety is likely to become.  So, even if it feels scary, find ways to gently challenge yourself.   Whether it is visiting the GP, watching certain TV shows, or avoid thinking about health-related topics; find ways to gently expose yourself to these fears. Although this may feel uncomfortable at first, your anxiety will eventually decrease the more that you do this.

4. Stop reassurance seeking

I see you and your internet search history! At best, this provides short-term relief, but you later start to doubt your findings.  At worst, you find the most catastrophic reason for your baby’s health symptoms and this sets you into all out panic. If you can’t stop this completely, then try to find ways of reducing this. The same goes for seeking reassurance from your partner, friends etc.  All of this stops you being able to trust your own ability to manage and to tolerate uncertainty.

5. Breathe

When you are anxious, it is common for your breathing to become shallow and to breathe from your chest. Instead, try to create deep breaths from your stomach. Try placing 1 hand on your chest and 1 hand on your belly. When you breathe in, the aim is to feel the hand on your belly raise rather than the hand on your chest. Try breathing in for a count of 4, and then out for a count of 8. Repeat this 10 times. This technique will help to regulate your nervous system in times of stress.

6. Schedule relaxing activities

Build-in relaxing activities to your schedule. This will help promote a relaxation response in your body, distract you from your worries and improve your mood. As well as activities that you can do alone if you are able to get a break, also try activities that you can do whilst with your baby. Consider activities such as walking in nature with the baby in a carrier,  doing a short meditation, or listening to a podcast whilst feeding.  Tip: Reading an enjoyable book on an electronic device (one-handed), or listening to an audiobook may help during those nighttime feeds; this might provide a welcome distraction from what could be a time of worrying.

If you are struggling with worrying about your baby’s health, I have created an online course that can help you.  This course will help you learn all the strategies you need to manage anxiety and stop those negative spirals of worry.  At the end of the course, you be equipped with everything that you will need to feel confident, content, and much more able to relax; enjoying life with your baby. 

Use the following link to find out more about the course.