Looking After Mum

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How to love your body more during pregnancy 

In this article, I share strategies to love your body more and change negative body image during your pregnancy. It includes Cognitive Behavioural Therapy techniques from my experience as a psychotherapist helping new mums deal with negative beliefs about their bodies. Additionally, I share some of my personal experiences of being pregnant and dealing with negative thoughts about my body. Give these seven techniques a try, and notice any changes in your view of your body that you may experience.

  1. Quieten your inner critic

It will be tough to improve your body image when your inner critic says negative things to you all of the time. Firstly, become aware of the thoughts about your body that you are having. Then, once you have realised you are speaking negatively, think of a kinder alternative. It could be as simple as; rather than “I hate my body”, it could be more like “I’m feeling uncomfortable in my body”. Or “urgh, my body is so weak” becomes “my body is home to another human being at the moment”. Try talking to yourself in the same way that you would speak to a good friend. Alternatively, imagine talking to your future child about their body. What words would you use? How would you help them to think about their body? The words we use about our bodies are powerful so try to choose your words wisely.



2. Unfollow social media accounts that make you feel bad

Comparison is inevitable at times. However, try to limit this as much as possible as it usually only makes you feel bad. I remember during my pregnancy, I was following some very tanned and fit pregnant mums living in Hawaii. At the early stages of pregnancy, this felt like a bit of a motivator to stay fit. But during the third trimester, whilst I could barely move due to pelvic girdle pain, working from home during the midst of the pandemic, the very sight of these women having seemingly healthy pregnancies going to the beach every day made me feel terrible about myself. Plus, I don’t even know what was happening behind the scenes for these women, because social media will always show their best bits. The social media accounts that you follow will be helpful in some seasons but not others. Don’t be afraid to be selective over your list and unfollow when necessary.



3. Look in the mirror every day

When not feeling good about yourself, it is all too easy to disconnect from your body. Instead, try looking at yourself in the mirror every day. Rather than looking away when you see something that you don’t like; instead, keep looking until that negative feeling fades away. Then, start noticing things that you do like about your body. Also, say what you are grateful for about your body. The more you do this, the easier it will be to develop positive associations when you look at your body.



4. Exercise

This point is a simple one. Exercise may not be possible for every person during pregnancy. However, for many people, you can do small bits of activity to make you feel stronger and help you connect with your body. Walking, jogging, pilates, home workouts, yoga or weight training all help towards helping you feel stronger. Search prenatal exercise online for some short and manageable routines that can help improve the way that you feel in your body.


5. Limit/stop weighing yourself

Consider stopping weighing yourself altogether. If the midwife needs to weigh you, you could ask them not to tell you the weight. During my pregnancy, I put on well over four stone in weight, despite not excessively overeating. Every time I weighed myself, it just made me feel awful. In any future pregnancies, I will not weigh myself. Instead, I will choose to focus on the health of my body. Obviously, weighing has a purpose, but it is likely to be far more helpful to focus on nourishing your body with nutritious foods where possible and giving your body acts of self-care.



6. Recognise unhelpful societal influences

We live in a patriarchal society that does not celebrate the beautiful changes that are going on in a woman’s body. This is all just false information that influences how we see our bodies. Regardless of what Western society chooses to celebrate, your body is magnificent, whatever shape or size it may be. Go against the societal grain, and actively choose to celebrate your curves and any other changes that you experience in your pregnant body. 

7. Write yourself a letter from your 100-year-old self

This technique can be helpful in many different situations that are causing you anxiety and distress. It can help you to connect to your intuition and greater wisdom. What would your 100-year-old self say to you? What advice would they give you? What would they tell you about your body? Write a letter to yourself and see what comes out. You may then choose to keep this letter for future reference, and you can draw upon these words when you need them.